I'm not sure why it's been so long since I last wrote... I have plenty of things to say. I could say I've been 'busy', or whatever, but the reality is... I sit at this desk all day, every day. Sometimes it's intimidating to know that my diary is online and anyone can read it... but other times, that's the only thing motivating me to write something.
Things have been moving right along in my life... I guess I still keep thinking that one day I'm going to wake up and magically no longer feel so heartbroken. It's been almost 6 months, and sometimes it's hard to believe it wasn't just yesterday. I know that it doesn't hurt nearly as much as it did... but it's still there. He was on tv the other night - just the back of his head. It startled me, because I actually didn't recognize the back of his head. I know that sounds silly. It was unsettling though. For a year and a half, the back of his head pretty much consumed my life... and now it's just a rusty memory.
Having said that... things are good. There was a line in this stupid movie I saw a few weeks ago that was something like "This is your life, right now. It's not going to stop and wait for you to get back on your feet". How true. I've been spending a lot of time with my girlfriends - Casey, specifically. We've been friends forever, but for some reason lately it seems like we just 'get' each other. We actually had a drunken conversation about it on Saturday night. We're very different people... but at the end of the day, we think alike. So... I'm happy. Sometimes lonely, sometimes sad... but you can't live your life in a haze. Pain reminds you that you're alive, right?
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